It's actually a piano piece I have just started working on, I've been cranking out Brahms Intermezzo 188 Op. 2... that's a beast of a piece, definitely beyond my skill level, but you learn the most when you push yourself is what I believe, and it's such a beautiful piece I don't think I could ever do it justice, I don't really think anyone could for that matter but when I play it I feel so alive, so passionate, sometimes I can sit hammering it out for about three hours and still feel like no time has passed at all, besides the sweat pouring from my body I wouldn't even be able to tell.
Like is funny sometimes. You make a plan A, then a plan B, then a Plan C, then plan D, etc. and God sometimes lets your plans go through but his plan is always plan Z something you never planned for and you may hate it at first or for a while, but the quicker you learn to except it the more you're bound to learn. I've found out that even though I still worry about things, I worry less now because I know that they are going to end up okay. I've had to trust God being lost in cities, running low on money, mixing up travel dates, but instead of resisting and trying so hard to get back to the original plans I had before, I'm learning to just say, "Ok, God, that's fine. I didn't plan it that way, I didn't really want it that way, but you know better and it's going to be all right." Because after it's said and done, I know God has better plans for me than I've had for myself my whole life.
I mean if you would have told me 3 years ago I would have been a music major or I'd be travelling around the U.S. or I would have gone to China by now, I would not have had that in my playbook. I never even intended to go to Vanguard, it was my last school choice, and yet I went and have been so blessed by it. I'm seeing these puzzle pieces fall into place when I thought they didn't fit together before. I hate it, I know, but I've learned to resist less and just stop holding on to my plans.
You know if I don't go to Graduate school, it's ok, maybe I'll go teach in China. Maybe that's where God wanted me all along. If I don't get a job teaching in China maybe I'll go spend a year teaching English or Music for a Christian ministry. Maybe if that doesn't work out....
The possibilities are endless, and instead of fearing the unknown I've grown to love it more, because I know God has something exciting planned that is better than anything I have planned in my life.
All you gotta do is look up at the Moon and stars and know it's going to be all right.
Love,
Dale
No comments:
Post a Comment